A few months ago Kenisia began hanging out with my wife all of the time. She decided that my wife is her "go to person." She is 11 yrs old and in 6th grade. She is going through all of the normal middle school awkwardness -- very aware and self conscious of her body, beginning to wonder who she is etc... She is an African American and is pretty involved in two churches that are mostly ran by Caucasians.
Mostly I wanted to talk about one particular incedent. This past Sunday Kenisia was hanging out at our house -- just acting like one of the family. She and my wife had just come from a Church Youth group in which K was the only black girl. As she and my wife talked it became clear that that had been very uncomfortable for her. The two other girls were cousins, and both fairly fit. The other girls had not been nice to her.
As they were talking my son began throwing a fit. My wife asked me to take him to his room to reprimand him. Kenisia automatically became very defensive. " Why are you sending him back there? It's because I'm black isn't it?" She was visibly bent out of shape about it. My wife asked why she would ever think that. "There are often black friends, and children in our house, we desire it. You yourself are over here everyday and I love it." Kenisia couldn't explain why, and the subject wasn't pushed any more. Eventually it was just dropped.
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